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| The Source - University of Denver |
Student co-authors book about blended families
By Warren Smith
After 3-year-old Elizabeth Schnieders' mother died, she dreamed her father would marry the perfect stepmother who would greet her with fresh cookies after school. It didn't work out that way.
"She was a corporate businesswoman who never dealt with children-never even babysat," says Schnieders of her stepmother, Kali. "And, she couldn't cook."
Kali and Elizabeth, now a second-year Daniels College marketing MBA student, survived their strained relationship to become good friends. While Elizabeth earned under-graduate degrees in psychology, and strategic communications at the University of Kansas, they co-authored the book, You're NOT My Mom: Confessions of a Formerly "Wicked" Stepmother (NavPress, 2005).
Their goal was to present both perspectives, so Kali and Elizabeth brainstormed a list of relationship moments-some funny, some life-changing. Then, they each wrote their recollections without consulting the other. In the book, their thoughts are juxtaposed in different typefaces.
"It's a bittersweet story," Elizabeth says. "In the beginning it was bitter-we were at each other's throats. And now it's sweet-we're best friends, and we love each other. My ultimate goal is to help other people get to the sweet part faster than we did."
A graduate teaching assistant in Daniels' marketing department, Elizabeth helps teach undergraduates how to write business plans for Assoc. Prof. Carol Johnson's Introduction to Marketing course.
"She's very good at teaching students to improve their writing and critical thinking," Johnson says. "I'm going to miss her when she graduates in June."
In addition to preparing for graduation, Elizabeth is planning an October wedding. She also flies in and out of Denver for book-promotion interviews and is looking for a job. She's considering touring with Kali, who is a motivational speaker.
Elizabeth says her classmates have responded positively to the book. "People share their stories-not always about step-parenting relationships-but about all relationships with parents," she says. "Most teenagers have moments when they think their parents aren't cool. It's good to see that happens to everybody."
Her advice to peers in blended families: "Be patient and don't expect any situation, parent or person to be perfect. If you dwell on that, you're going to miss out on the great things they have to offer."
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